This dawdling side is nothing new! I remember when Maisy was in gymnastics as a very young two-year-old, and the teacher would laugh at her no-hurry, take-the-long-way, stop-and-lay-on-the-mat-for-no-apparent-reason personality. It IS funny! Except when we have to be somewhere. Or when I just want to move on with my day instead of waiting hours for Maisy to pull up her pants after going potty so that I can help her brush her teeth. This potty-teeth-get dressed-brush hair routine can take FOR-EV-ER. And it's daily. So my patience stretches and s-t-r-e-t-c-h-e-s and s--t--r--e--t--c--h--e--s and then I snap, and I yell.
I do Mad Mental Math: We've been doing this for 45 minutes. It's 8:37 and we need to load up the van by 8:45. I've asked her to put her left sock on 6 times. I turn into a calculator, adding numbers into my head while I wait for my little girl to find a sense of urgency that doesn't exist, and all the while the kindness subtracts from my voice, and then my anger multiplies, and I yell.
Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
When I resort to harsh words, it stirs up Maisy's anger, and pretty soon we're both upset. Whatever is supposed to be happening gets delayed, and we're both reacting in anger. Pointless, right? But so challenging! So this is what I've been battling with lately, truly battling.
I've decided to change. I feel convicted to change. So here we go, the 30-Day Keep-Your-Cool Challenge (cool, in honor of this chilly 25-degree morning).
My Day 1:
Start with Prayer. I prayed about it this morning before Maisy was even awake. I asked God for extended patience for my little girl. The fruit of the Spirit, right? Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Right on! I needed to pray first. I need to keep praying, so that the fruit of the Spirit can flow right out from me, starting in my own home.
Be Willing to Be Late. This morning, I decided that being a few minutes late would be worth it. Leaving at 8:52 instead of 8:45 would be okay if it meant that we left the house without leaving behind us an echo of angry voices. And guess what? Maisy was still on time for preschool - just not a few minutes early like we usually are. Even better, she was even brighter and shinier than usual, stopping to greet the school director with a cheery "hey there!" (haha), and exclaiming, "Good morning, Mrs. Gatz!" with extra cheer when we arrived at her classroom.
Celebrate. As we drove to school today, I told Maisy, "Thumbs up, Maisy! No one got upset this morning. Thumbs up for Mommy and Maisy!" "Yeah!" said my sweet little dawdler. I mean "daughter." ;)
"Thumbs up, Buttercup." Maisy giggled.
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Do you hear an edge to your voice that you don't like? Does your volume get turned up too loud? Do you sense that an occasional outburst is on verge of becoming a cycle of short tempers? It's the 30-Day Keep-Your-Cool Challenge. I'll probably blow it sometimes. There's no such thing as a perfect parent, right? I just want this to be my number one goal for the next 30 days. I want to build better habits, starting now. I want to be a good example for my kids as they grow. I can do better, starting now.
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